Hasbro Kills Scrabulous

When Al Gore invented the Internet, it was a simple and enjoyable place where people could just hang out without much in the way of government and corporate interference. But sadly those days are long gone. Today it's all about corporate greed and bullshit.

Today the latest casualty is the much loved Facebook application called Scrabulous. It was the most popular game on the social networking site, with nearly a million Facebook users, and half a million active players every day. It allowed people from all over the world to enjoy a version of Scrabble with their friends.

Scrabble became a trademark in 1948, and at the moment the rights to the game are owned world wide by Mattel. However, for some reason in America and Canada the rights are owned by Hasbro.

Hasbro decided that they were unhappy with the existence of Scrabulous on Facebook and decided to sue the creators of the game and write nasty letters to Facebook demanding that the application be taken offline. Today the game has been disabled for American and Canadian players. So while the rest of the world enjoys the game, we get the shaft. To their credit Mattel who owns the rest of the world wide rights has not made any decision to sue or threaten.

Now you'd think that having played the part of playground bully, Hasbro would have their own version of Scrabble to push right? Wrong. The nearest thing available to American and Canadian players is a beta version, yes a beta version, of Scrabble produced by Electronic Arts. The only problem is, it doesn't actually work.

Let me repeat this. Hasbro has pulled the plug on Scrabulous so that we cannot play Scrabble at all on Facebook. What the fuck kind of stupidity is that? They've had since 2004 (when Facebook went live), to develop something. And the best they could do is get a non-working beta version of the game?

The sad thing is, unless a legal solution can be found the best we can hope for is an official version of Scrabble on Facebook in which the US and Canada is separated from the rest of the world.

Now I can see that Hasbro have a point. No one wants their trademark stolen. No one wants their idea used by another for profit. But what Scrabulous did was create close to a million people who now have a new interest in Scrabble. These people are not going to go out and buy a board version of Scrabulous, because there isn't one. Many of these Internet enthusiasts are going to buy a real board game, thus helping the brand, not hurting it.

Hasbro have been threatening a lawsuit for at least six months now. So they've had at least that long to make their Facebook application work. Mattel managed to get a working version for the rest of the world. So how has Hasbro manage to fuck things up so badly?

I know there are far more important issues in the world right now. Like the sad destruction of the Grand Pier at Weston-Super-Mare. But still, this is just another example of heavy handed RIAA style corportate bullshit in which only the consumer loses out.

Hogan Knows Best

"You know what? I am actually not that much into voting. I think it's kind of crazy that a woman is running because I think that women deal with a lot of emotions and menopause and PMS and stuff. Like, I'm so moody all the time, I know I couldn't be able to run a country, because I would be crying one day and yelling at people the next day, you know?"

McCainiac

I think I've made my position on old man McCain pretty clear. This guy is George Bush II: The Old Man Cometh. But this week he appears to be trying to compete with his Bush buddy with a series of McCainisms. In the 2000 election we all chuckled at Bushisms, where Bush displayed to the world just what a moron he was, and we elected him anyway.

This week McCain started his gaffes with the comment that there was a situation on the Iraq / Pakistan border. I think the 'situation' might be that there is no Iraq / Pakistan border, because there's a fucking country separating them called Iran!

But apparently the old man had more to say. On Wednesday, in what can only be described as a 'look at my balls' move, he credited George Bush with the recent drop in fuel prices.

Yep, that's right folks. During the Bush administration gas has jumped from 99c a gallon to well over $4 a gallon, thanks to his masterful control of the economy. In the past few weeks the price fell back a few cents, and this McCainiac wants us to thank George Bush!!!

I was completely dumbfounded by this statement. It would be like thanking a rapist for not killing you after he'd finished raping you.

Smile

I've seen some bullshit on the Internet over the years. From the bogus lottery wins to the members of the Nigerian Royal Family who need my help (and bank account) to get their fortune out of the country.

But I got an email today that really does take the cake. It was from Kodak. You may remember them as a company that used to make film, back in the old days when cameras were not digital.

Apparently some time ago when I was looking for a Flickr like company to put some pictures I had experimented with Kodak Gallery. I may have uploaded a picture or two and concluded the service was shit.

In the email I got today, they told me that I had 30 days to buy something or they were going to delete all my photographs! WTF?

That is the most unreal kind of marketing I've ever seen. There wasn't even a get out clause, like I could do something free to maintain my account. No if I want to have an account I need to give them money or have all my photographs deleted.

Now admittedly I don't use the service, and I don't give a shit if they delete my few images, but it just struck me as an incredible crass method of cleaning shop. But I guess when your stock price is half what it was three years ago, and you are becoming less relevant to the modern world desperation kicks in.

In an effort to catch up with my blog entries, I thought I'd rant here. It's as good a place as any.

I Endorse Obama

Recently I met someone playing poker and later discovered they had a blog. Upon reading it I came to an important realization: Blogs are supposed to be updated on a regular basis. I guess I didn't get the memo because I've clearly been a lazy bastard recently (where recent is probably a couple of decades or so) and I've not been keeping up with the blogging thing.

I'm sure the legions of fans have been missing my pointless rambling over the past few months, and therefore I wanted to reward their patience with a new post.

As we continue the incredibly long and tedious path to the White House it seems we are left, as usual, with a decision between two politicians. There are a large chunk of Americans who have to vote along party lines. Either you are pro life or pro choice, pro guns or uninterested in guns, gay hating or tolerant, etc. American politics appears to take the basic issues, pretend there is no gray area, and then guilt you in to voting in order to support your cause.

Personally, I can't vote. Something about being a damn immigrant. But if I were to vote, it would have to be for Obama.

I actually think he has a good message. Some say he is all fluff and no policy, but if you switch off Fox News for a moment and visit the Obama web site you'll see that he is detailed and clear about all the major issues. So if you think he is full of fluff, you aren't paying attention.

Then we have John McCain. Oh dear. Let's be clear about this. If he were in the work place, the only job he would seriously be considered for is a greeter at Wal-Mart. The guy is 71, going on 72. If he made two terms he would be 80. I'm sorry, to have to say this, but people of that age are not fit to run anything. They need to sit back and let the living take care of the world. They should restrict their politics to grumbling about the good old days to anyone that would listen.

Now, I know that may come across as harsh, but it's reality. This country does not need some doddery old fogey at the helm, regardless of his policies. But sadly his policies don't really make him any more appealing. He has talked about the need to distance ourselves from Russia and China. He has suggested ideas and policies that could bring about a new cold war, and hurt relations with a country that makes almost everything we buy. Then throw in the usual right wing crap about guns, abortions and sanctity of marriage, and you have George Bush II: This Time He's Old, And A Bit Less Of A Dick.

After eight years of being ass raped by George Bush, it is amazing that there is anyone left who would support a candidate so similar to what we are about to get rid of. I don't think that Obama is perfect. But then I have a general disdain for all politicians. However, the clear reality is, a vote for McCain is horrific act of unbridled stupidity.

I'm Thinking Arby's

I guess I must be an idiot. When I heard the term Market Fresh sandwich, and saw that it contained lean turkey on what looked like multi grain wheat bread, I assumed that it would be a reasonable snack for the middle of the day.

But recently I've become interested in the content of my food, since it is rather hard to escape the fact that so many Americans are so fat. In fact since I've lived in the States I have gained a few pounds myself, and I wondered why.

Apart from the litany of horrific and should be illegal additives that are placed in our food, I've also noticed that most food here in America seems to contain enough sodium to kill a horse.

For the most part I have found I can combat these evil foods with organic products from my local organic supermarket. It is surprising how good organic food tastes, even without a ton of additives or salt.

But real life dictates that sometimes I have to eat 'normal' food. So the other day I took a trip to Arby's for lunch. I ate three items. A small beef and cheddar sandwich, some southwest egg rolls, and a market fresh turkey sandwich.

Now I am not an idiot, I didn't expect this to be particularly healthy, although I thought it would be a lot better than most fast food offerings in the area.

Turns out my meal, was the meal from hell. Upon checking the handy nutritional guide on Arby's web site, it seemed my meal was about as unhealthy as it gets.

This meal contained 2112 calories. 109g of fat, of which 31g was saturated fat, and 5.5g was trans fat. There was 265mg of cholesterol, 179g of carbs, and 163% of my RDI for Iron.

All not good, but the sodium content was what blew me away; 4911mg of sodium. Yep, more than double the recommended daily amount to be healthy.

Now I have to be honest, I wasn't expecting the egg rolls or the beef and cheddar sandwich to be healthy, but amazingly it was the turkey ranch sandwich that was the least healthy item there. Even less healthy than a white bun, stuffed with beef and melted fake processed cheese. This healthy looking market fresh sandwich contained 834 calories and 2258mg of sodium.

Of course silly me, I should have ordered the healthy wrap instead right? Well not really. Taking the wrap merely drops it to 699 calories, yet still a staggering 2215mg of sodium.

I can only assume that Arby's kills turkeys by dropping them into a boiling vat of salty fat.

Again I wasn't expecting food from Arby's to be especially healthy, but for me at least it was hard to believe that a market fresh turkey sandwich had double the sodium of a Big Mac from McDonald's. In fact, if I ate a Big Mac and THREE orders of LARGE fries from McDonald's I would still have consumed less sodium than a single market fresh sandwich from Arby's.

So why the rant? Apart from to announce I will never purchase food from Arby's again. Frankly I feel conned. When a restaurant shows me a 'healthy' wrap and talks about lean turkey meat and fresh ingredients being made to order. I expect that at least to be somewhat true. In all the times I ate at Arby's, I believed, thanks to their marketing, that I was not exactly eating healthy, but at least I wasn't eating those evil cheeseburgers from McDonald's. Lean turkey meat surely had to be so much better than beef dripping with fat right?

But apparently I was an idiot. In an effort to avoid the obviously bad for me, I seemed to have been led astray by a wolf in sheep's clothing.

Well so long Arby's and thanks for all the sodium. In my humble opinion when one single food item contains a day's supply of sodium, there should be a warning label right on the product: Warning, eating this will make you fat, give you high blood pressure, and ultimately kill you. This may look like a fairly reasonable sandwich, but you'd be better off with a cheeseburger and fries.

That's Hot?

It's not that I don't like Paris Hilton. I'm really not a hater, as her fans are calling those who think she should go to jail. But I find myself utterly ambivalent to the thought of her serving time.

With one in ten Americans currently in jail it has to be said that going to jail is pretty commonplace in America. As an American Paris should know that. She should also know that if you are stupid enough to wind up on probation for committing a crime, you need to walk on eggshells until your probation is up.

Paris should know a lot of things, especially with the availability of the finest education that money can buy. But unfortunately for her she does not seem to know very much at all. In fact her entire career has been based on playing the role of a spoiled little whoiress bimbo who values looks, money and fashion above common sense, morals and values. But at this time her ignorance and stupidity have finally caught up with her.

In September of 2006 she is arrested for DUI and pleads no contest. She gets probation and a suspended license. In January of 2007 she was pulled over and warned that she was driving on a suspended license. She signed a document telling her she was not allowed to drive. In February of 2007 she is pulled over for speeding without her lights on, still on a suspended license.

Just how many second chances does this bimbo want?

I really am not the kind of person that believes in adding to the already unnecessarily large jail population in this country. But at some point someone like Paris Hilton needs to be told, enough is enough.

This girl has everything she wants handed to her. She has more money than most people will ever earn in a life time of hard work. All she has to do is not break the law, how hard is that? A woman like Paris could afford a limo to go everywhere. She could demand that other people pay for her to have a limo. If a night club is willing to pay $50,000 for a personal appearance, I'm pretty sure they will spring for a limo too.

It is this fact that annoys me about this case more than anything else. Paris Hilton has choices. She is not some single mom living in a trailer in rural Mississippi. She is a multi-millionaire who gets paid fortunes just to show up and drink free drinks. It would be almost effortless for her to have her agent arrange for drivers to take her where she wants to go. The extra expense is going to be meaningless to someone in her position. But the fact is she simply does not care. She has demonstrated time and again that she believes herself to be above the law. She thinks she is so incredibly important and powerful that she does not have to confine herself to the rules and regulations that govern other 'ordinary' people.

What's even sadder is that vacuous little bimbos often still in high school actually look up to this person as a role model. You only have to watch some girl on My Super Sweet 16 to see that among the spoiled and the ignorant, Paris Hilton is something of an icon.

Well it's now time for Paris to grow up. She needs to start to accept responsibility for her own actions and learn that the things that she does affect other people and her future. You can't go through life in your own little world, ignoring the realities of society and doing whatever you like. If Paris ends up in jail she is going to have a rude awakening to the harsh realities of life. Frankly, maybe this will be a good thing for her. Maybe this wakeup call will result in her being a better person.

I noticed too that her mother was pretty vocal in court, lashing out at the prosecutor and implying that her daughter was being deliberately targeted because of who she is. Well Mrs. Hilton, your daughter is precisely who she is because of the upbringing you and your husband gave her. We are all products of our environment. Before you start casting your allegations, perhaps you should take a long hard look at the serious mistakes you made that resulted in the creation of Paris Hilton.

Are you a Mitchum Man?

If there's one thing I don't like it is some smarmy little marketing expert telling me what to think about who I am and the products I buy. This is probably why I fast forward through commercials and TiVo everything. But I digress.

I've been a bit lazy in my blogging lately, what with having a life, and not living in my parents' basement. But the new ad campaign for Mitchum that has been going on few a little while has been really pissing me off.

"If you're the only one who knows which remote controls what...you're a Mitchum man."

Either that or you married a moron who cannot operate a simple electronic gadget.

How about this one:

"If you've ever dated a yoga instructor...you're a Mitchum man."

Or:

"If hammering stuff is your way of unwinding...you're a Mitchum man."

I mean seriously, just fuck off. I buy a chemical that stops me from producing a foul smelling wetness under my arm. This isn't a lifestyle choice. I didn't pick up this product because I am suffering from the delusion that using a certain kind of deodorant will make me more manly. This isn't 1950. Are you going to tell me next which brand of cigarettes I need to start smoking?

Seiko have already explained that it is my watch that defines who I am, so I don't need a fucking deodorant company to do the same.

The stick I have at home tells me that I am a Mitchum man if I believe that the ratio of lighter fluid to charcoal on a barbecue should be 2:1. But if that were the case, even if I were still alive, I'd need to buy a new barbecue. Not that I own one. You see it is not a prerequisite of being a man that you must enjoy cooking outside.

All in all the Mitchum commercials simply encourage ridiculous stereotypes, sexism, and the believe that behaving like a Neanderthal chauvinist is an attractive male trait. In fact you can even go to their web site where you are encouraged to take a 'man test' to see how manly you are. An actress then pretends to get excited about your answers if you profess to be a thick headed moron.

Seriously, if your deodorant defines you. If you have to take a test to find out if you are a man. If you find sexism and the oppression of women funny, then quite simply you are a jerk. You don't even have to take a test to figure that one out.