American Idol Kicks Bucket

Like most of this (and previous) seasons of American Idol, I watched the show only because I have a DVR and can fast forward through most of it.

Last night was the grand finale and I was incredibly grateful to be able to condense the 128 minute show into less than an hour.

The show clearly illustrated beyond any reasonable doubt why Simon Cowell decided to quit such a lucrative gig. The aging producers of the show have clearly lost touch with their audience, and it's only a matter of time now before they squeeze the last drop of dignity and taste out of the show and leave it for dead by the side of the entertainment highway.

As usual Ryan Toolcrest was an annoying prick. The supposedly mushy moments for Simon were overdone. Someone made the decision to bring rejected retards onto the show, one of whom grabbed the mic and in an insanity produced delusion started shouting that he was going to take over from Simon, until they cut early to commercial. Perhaps they should have done the same when the train wreck that is Paula Abdul took to the stage for no real reason.

Speaking of the mentally disadvantaged, William Hung was wheeled out for another cringe worthy performance. But the saddest moments of the evening were the aging rockers that, like Dick Clarke on New Years, were wheeled out to rock out one last time, to some tragic anthem that once made them famous, and still keeps them in comfortable retirement.

The one thing that Simon Cowell talks about with up coming stars is relevance. Something that today's youth will enjoy. I guarantee right now that 90% of the teen audience at the Idol finale, would not have been able to identify over half of the geriatric performers that came out on stage last night. I'm as old as two of those audience members put together, and even I couldn't identify most of them, even if I vaguely remember hearing my father listening to some of those songs on the radio when I was a child.

If Simon had been in charge of the finale, he would never have allowed such a crappy show, and I believe this is why he is leaving. Clearly the aging hippies who make Idol have no clue what young people are into these days (vodka eyeballing anyone?) I mean who gives a shit about Janet Jackson or Alice Cooper? And those were the two that were recognizable. Even Christina Aguilera, for all her obvious talent, is yesterdays news; recently cancelling her tour because no one would buy tickets, just like no one is buying her music any more.

As a fan of Simon Cowell, I'm glad he has left now and will distance himself from a franchise that has lost touch, and seems oblivious to its own obsolescence.

As for the winner, it is of no relevance. With the kind of exposure they have both had over the past few weeks, they now have every opportunity to make a fortune in the music business. And for that at least, we should be thankful to the show.