Celebrity Apprentice: Joan & Melissa Rivers

I've always thought that Joan Rivers was a scary apparition. An iconic and sad reflection on American society: One obsessed with money, looks and fame. And her daughter always seemed to me to be a pathetic hanger on, riding her mothers coat tails in lieu of any personal talent.

But my opinion of these two freaks began to change a little as I watched them on the Celebrity Apprentice. Joan was genuinely funny, and pretty quick witted for someone I can only assume is about 100 or so.

Her daughter on the other hand was everything I expected her to be: An entitled spoiled little princess bitch, who has almost no talent.

The mother and daughter duo proceeded to pretend they were above the show and acted crazy like they both could use some considerable therapy. Joan attacked the sexist asshole and full time control freak Clint Black for being a complete tool. But then just episodes after claiming that she was going to burn all his CDs, became friends with him.

Professional poker player, and psychological genius Annie Duke, played them both like a couple of children in an adult world. Despite their claims that they 'knew' her game (and likening her first to Hitler, and later to Satan), they got PWND; royally.

This past week, Melissa was as useless as ever and played the role of whiny brat. When that didn't work for her she began spouting wild and paranoid allegations (everyone was apparently out to get her because she was just SO good).

Ultimately Donald Trump gave Melissa Rivers her marching orders, and she proceeded to act like the spoiled little media whore her mother raised her to be. She threw a tantrum which included yelling at the producers, and refusing to give an exit interview.

In a move of solidarity, her mother claimed she too would leave the show.

In all the years of the Apprentice, I have never seen such pathetic grandstanding. And I've seen the Queen of crazy Amaroso on the show.

What made me laugh really is that the Rivers contingent made a number of allegations about Annie Duke's class and various other personal insults, while pretending to be above such good-for-nothing poker scum.

Unfortunately for them, what they did display is their true colors. They are both total assholes, and are the center of the universe that exists within their own minds. If the whole world is not revolving around them, they want a public inquiry to investigate why not.

Annie Duke does not have their 'star power' but what she has is far greater; a brilliant mind. She owned them both from beginning to end. She kept calm and used her poker/psychological skills to outwit them, and use their own egos against them. She became the greatest ever Celebrity Apprentice fundraiser in the history of the show.

Meanwhile, the Rivers family displayed a complete lack of class, and furthermore were willing to put their own egos above the importance of raising money for their respective charities.

As far as I am concerned I hope they both remain off the show, and indeed off my TV indefinitely. My metaphorical hat is off to Annie Duke for destroying them in such an entertaining way.

My money would be on Annie to win the whole thing. It really is her competition to lose at this point.